Hope & Ravens

I've been reading a book called "Plan B" by Pete Wilson.  It's all about how God works through those Plan B moments in your life...you know- when you have Plan A all figured out and it crashes down around you and you have to go to Plan B. 

No one chooses a Plan B- it just happens.  And I know because I have been through a few in my life- having scoliosis and wearing a back brace for three years in Jr. High (that makes you really popular by the way), dealing with an eating disorder, the death of my grandma, grandpa and dad in a four month period of time, moving far away from family & friends, and infertility.  I am no stranger to Plan Bs, so you would think I would be prepared for them by now. 

Nope.

Not even close. 

My husband lost his job six months ago and things have been really tough.  There has been no one to bail us out and it is a scary time, especially having two kids.  The job hunt has been slow and we are all without health insurance.  Honestly- there are some things that have not gotten paid.  I hate it with all my heart- but it is what it is.  It stinks.  And in moments of weakness I have not dealt with it very well. 

So when I had the chance to see RED in Indy- I was so stoked because I knew I would take some shred of hope with me.  And it got cancelled.  Another Plan B- actually one of the gals with me that night called it that- and I didn't do too well with that either.  Then I jumped at the chance to go see them in Nashville and the shred of hope that I so longed for was WAY more than that! 

You see- God spoke through those four guys that night and gave me a whole lot of hope and not just a shred!  When Michael sang "Not Alone" he knelt down and during the part "And I will be your hope, when you feel like it's over, I will pick you up- when your whole world shatters," and as he looked in my eyes- I knew that God had ahold of me- of my family- my novel- my school- my friends- He had it. 

Pete Wilson says this; "While life is uncertain, God is not.  While our power is limited, God's is limitless.  While our hope may be fragile, God is hope himself." 

Hope. 

My hope is fragile at best..but God IS hope.  Wow!  That is an amazing truth!  And it mirrors "Not Alone"
"I am with you, I will carry you through it all.  I won't leave you, I will catch you when you feel like letting go, cuz you're not, you're not alone..."

It's been a theme for me the last few weeks....hope.  It has come in the form of Bible verses, songs, movies, you name it- it has come my way. 

So today I found out that I did not get selected for the writing conference that I applied for a scholarship for.  I was crushed and here we go with Plan B again.... but I read the words from the book "Plan B"  and here is what it said:
"I can have hope when there is no circumstantial reason to have hope.  My hope is not based on what the stock market does or what others think of me or whether my life turns out the way I want it to turn out.  My hope is based on a powerful, in-control God who can do and will do the impossible."

Yep..more hope. 

Then I had a 'light bulb' moment.  Elijah in the Bible had been dealing with some tough things and found himself alone and without food.  But God sent him hope in the form of a raven.  That raven fed Elijah faithfully and was God's way of giving him hope. 

Just as I know God has sent my ravens in my yard as well as in my novel.  They give me hope.  And I know that God has plans that I have no clue about.  No matter what the Plan B is- unemployment or a dashed dream or whatever you are going through right now...Hope is there.

When I was having my pity party about the writing thing this afternoon and was bulleting prayers at God- the only thing I could think of was He was saying- "I've got this."

And that's enough for me.